“Manifest” and “Law of Attraction” are buzz terms that have become really trendy, watering down and diminishing the magic that is possible. Many try and many fail because they follow the advice of a social media meme that has jumped on a bandwagon, but has no real knowledge. In this post I will cover basics to get you started… Be sure to watch for the paid Behind the Blog coming in 2023 for more in-depth knowledge or request information for Law of Attraction coaching.
It’s the time of year where everyone is making New Years Resolutions they will inevitably be failing at by February. To not be part of the crowd, you have decided along with myself and many others, that you will create a vision/dream board, place intentions out into the Universe, and more than likely ran into the terms “manifesting” & “Law of Attraction” while searching for inspiration. You may have tried manifesting in the past because when the documentary “The Secret” became popular, many believed they could just say a few things and the world will be at the door step. What you may not know, but may have experienced personally, many people fail at manifesting because they have not been given proper guidance. I can’t count the number of millennials I have had in my inbox saying they need help because they know I’m a LOA Coach. I don’t give my services away for free & too many want fast fixes without giving anything of themselves in return. (One of the biggest reasons people fail at manifesting, they don’t want to have to DO anything). That has left many I know personally out there clueless or with tidbits of advice I had previously shared on FB, and they didn’t take the time to read. So… In this post I will cover some basics around LOA (Law of Attraction). As a certified coach in the subject, I see many fail before they even begin so I feel it is only right I get you off on the right foot. Keep in mind this is only covering basics as this is a service I provide and giving my all my knowledge away for free tells the Universe I believe that I don’t deserve to be compensated for my skills. That is DEFINITELY not the energy I want to put out!
My resistance to writing this due to what I am manifesting…
Being honest, this is a post I have put off writing. I have touched on Law of Attraction based mindset in other blogs, given the importance of certain mindset shifts to help succeed, and stressed importance of different practices in order to attract better circumstances. But a blog specifically on this topic, hasn’t happened. The last part of the paragraph above is why. LOA is very in-depth, intensive, complicated, and takes work. You can EASILY attract the exact opposite to yourself depending on your wording and what energy you are sending out! Many are under the impression that you make a wish and wait for it to happen, which it won’t most times unless you’re lucky. There is SO MUCH wrong info out there that if I were to go through it ALL, I would be coaching for no fee. That’s sending an energetic message that the money I paid for my training & certification, my time to type the info, my skills and tools gained on my manifestation journey, and any research done is worth no value. So how do I write a free post about a subject that I deserve compensation for? Well, we cover the basics and I direct you to posts where things have been previously covered. (I am mentioning my worth many times here in order to be clear, I fully believe in my monetary worth on EVERY subject I blog about. My message is clear!)
What your doing wrong
OK, moving on from that… Let’s go though some scenarios I have personally dealt with. When someone says that LOA isn’t working for them and manifesting sometimes seems to bring the opposite of their desires, I ask some questions. First being “What are you manifesting?” The answer that usually follows begins with “I’m trying to manifest….” and I stop them there. You don’t TRY to manifest, you manifest. If you’re TRYING to do something you aren’t actually DOING it. See how wording can fuck you? I then lead them to continue and the most recent one was “I was TRYING to manifest good weather so I could make it to Denver.” My next question was “Are you EVER able to control the weather? Is there ANY actions you can take in order to change the atmospheric pressure and mother nature?” Obviously the answer is clear and that brings us to the number 1 mistake people make. You are trying to manifest something you have no control over and can’t take action to change. Under this umbrella of things you can’t manifest we will also find other people behavior, other peoples health, actually anything having to do with other people, the end of war, global financial issues, anything involving mother nature, and just anything that YOU PERSONALLY have no ability to take action on. Why? Well that the next mistake…
Scenario 2… Someone says “I have been manifesting a better job for a year now and nothing has come my way.” My question “Did you take action and look for other jobs?” The amount of times I have been told there was NO ACTION after manifestation is mind blowing! You CAN NOT expect results with no action. Every word and action is an energetic message. When you want a new job you have to LOOK FOR A NEW JOB! LOA or not, your actions are showing you don’t want it, period. Here is how this could work better: Put it out in the Universe in wording such as “I am looking forward to a new job that pays more to support my family.” You word it as if you expect it soon. Next, you look for that job, you put the word out for others to keep their eyes open, you begin making a resume for your interview, pick out clothes you will wear, and even begin thinking about how hours may be different so you may need to get prepared in ways of child care or appointments. THIS send an energetic vibration that your new job can latch onto and find you. What you are seeking really is seeking you too!! Give it a damn highway to follow by TAKING ACTION!!
Scenario 3… Someone says “My life still sucks no matter what I do. I’ve been manifesting better luck but my bills still barely get paid on time, my boyfriend is always mad at me, my job sucks, my antidepressant meds keep going up in dosage, my doctor thinks I have ulcers, my car broke down and nothing ever works out for me.” WOW!!! This describes someone who flat out probably doesn’t actually believe they are even worthy of what they are manifesting. This is an example of someone I would take manifesting off the table with immediately!! Why? Because they already are manifesting but it all the crap they mentioned!! THAT shit is their focus and the Universe is riding that vibratory wave to create more of it! See, the energetics of LOA doesn’t weed out good vs bad. That is why the people who are always taking about how shitty their life is seem to get hit with one thing after another. It is what they are manifesting!! Gratitude is what is key here along with finding out the root of their depression. I’m not a clinical counselor or counselor of any kind BUT I am trained in multiple tools that help with mental and emotional issues. So we begin with implementing Gratitude into their daily life in multiple forms. We also establish some form of meditation to help calm some of those feelings that keep the amygdala fired up. See, for healthy manifestation work you need a healthy mindset. Your peace MUST begin inside yourself and if you’re looking for the things your attempting to manifest to bring you that peace, you will be disappointed.
Scenario 4… A person comes to me disappointed because they have been manifesting 1) a partner who fits their desires 2) their current partner to be better 3) their relationship with someone else to be healthier. This rarely works and if it does, there was som intentional actions behind it and things didn’t just happen. Here’s why. We CAN NOT control other people. Therefore, manifesting changes in them or for them to come into our lives is a waste of energy. What you CAN DO is put the intention out there and then begin with yourself. If you desire a certain type of love interest, begin being the person that love interest would be attracted to. ONLY do this if that feels authentic to you!! Do not change yourself for a partner! For example: You would like a kind helpful partner but your a total bitch who doesn’t help anyone but yourself…MAKE SOME CHANGES!! On the other hand you may already be attracted to someone let’s say they have different spiritual views. Don’t change your belief system for others to notice you. If you want your current partner to treat you better, stop accepting disrespect. Start making healthy decisions that are noticeable and send a clear message how you will be treated moving forward. They will either get the clue or not. Be prepared in case of the later. If you want a healthier relationship, begin seeing your part in where it is unhealthy and again, make those fixes to YOU. In all the above you can only take action on YOU. This is why this type of manifesting rarely works the way it was hoped to. Often times, the person ends up making a choice between their existing relationship and they person they have transformed into (THAT WAS ME!) or they end up not attracting the right partner because they are too stuck to make changes needed to themselves.
What is the “right” way?
So, this can get complicated pretty quickly. You must have certain things in place before you even begin. This requires you to do some work on your belief system, how you view yourself and your confidence, and your mindset about all of it. Before you begin manifesting is suggest doing the following:
- Check where your mental/emotional state is. Negative thinking and outlook is the worst mindset to have when manifesting. Your will for sure implement the Law of Attraction but it won’t be in ways you desire.
- How confident are you in the fact that you fully deserve and have earned what you desire? Can you feel it, taste it, smell it, and hold it in your minds eye as something you KNOW is yours already? This is the confidence level you want to have. You may view some millionaires as arrogant assholes who always get what they want but thats why they get what they want. That ego centered attitude puts out that they KNOW they deserve the finer things in life, so that is exactly what comes to them. Don’t be an arrogant asshole tho, be confident!!
- Why are you manifesting? Are you looking for a quick easy fix to your life? Not gonna happen. Are you wanting to feel more happiness, peace and joy and feel a good thing coming to your life will assist with that? Again, you will be disappointed. Are you desperate because you found yourself in a financial problem and need money fast? Manic manifestation is a bad idea because your mindset and thoughts are stuck on the money you don’t have. This will at times cause more money issues to materialize.
- Do you have the ambition to actually take actions towards your desire? You will accomplish nothing if you do nothing. This hangs up so many because what they see on social media doesn’t portray the work you MUST put in behind the intention.
- Do you have the ability to see gratitude for even the smallest of things? Gratitude is one of the most important tools in LOA. When we are grateful for the life we have NOW and the smallest things in it, it sends out a message that you desire more to be grateful for because THAT is where your focus is. You’re not focused on what you want, you’re focused on what you have, which will then in turn attract what you want. This is easily explained with something we have all done. You wake up and at some point in the morning you spill coffee on your shirt. Some may utter the words “Oh great, today is going to suck if it is beginning like this.” Sure as shit, your entire day sucked! But if instead after the feeling of annoyance for spilling the coffee, you shift to the fact that at least you are home and can change. You’re grateful it wasn’t the last of the coffee you spilled. And you’re blessed to have a clean shirt to change into. Gratitude is HUGE and I suggest you start a Gratitude Journal yesterday!
- Be realistic!! I am not saying don’t send out manifestations of the most amazing things you can think of. It is always good to have big goals and dreams because that brings happy feelings and floods us with dopamine! What I am saying is if your manifesting $1,000,000 it is going to be a bit harder to take actions towards that. You could spend money on a lottery ticket I guess but your chances are still the same as everyone else’s. Be realistic in your intentions and grow from there.
These are just the basic recommendations you need to check before proceeding. At the very least make sure you have the Mindset to attract the positive things you desire, the willingness to bring action into the intentions, and the ability to show gratitude for what you have NOW. As far as timing, you can manifest anytime. When thinking about the above coffee scenario, when these things happen and we write off the day as being screwed, the Universe isn’t caring what place the moon is in or what day of the week it is. I personally do use the New Moon for manifestation but I am highly in tune with her, I’m an astrologer, and I just find myself in great mindsets around the New Moon. For me it gives an extra punch due to New Moons symbolizing new beginnings.
Example of healthy manifesting
Assuming all the above are in place and you have something realistic you are wanting to manifest, we will use getting an apartment, here is how that would look. I personally write because I feel it gives more power but you can type if thats what is comfortable for you. You head it with your intention and then write out your desire as if it IS happening or JUST happened. So it looks something like this:
I will attain the perfect apartment that I can easily afford and suits all my needs! (Now, act like your making a journal entry if that helps you, or your writing a letter to a friend)
I am so excited to move into my new apartment! It is clean, safe, in a great location, affordable, and the neighbors are so nice! I am excited to make the extra bedroom into a yoga/meditation space and already know where I am putting things. It is ground level so moving in will be easy and I already have multiple people willing to help me move! I love the size of the kitchen and how the morning light will come right in the living room to begin my day. I have so much gratitude for the ability to pay the deposit in payments because the landlord is a real decent human being who believes in helping others in anyway possible to get them into a place that makes them happy! I am so excited to have people over and to decorate!!
Add feeling, details, people, and other things you would put in a letter of journal entry if you were in fact writing about something that has happened or is currently happening. This is where that belief comes in! I find the more deserving I think I am for what I am manifesting, the more details and specifics I have in my writing. If I can’t get super specific or have trouble seeing details, I wait until I can truly see myself with my manifestation.
Next, TAKE ACTION!! At this point I would put on social media to the masses “Hey everyone, I am looking for a 2 bedroom apartment in the ________ price range. Preferably in the middle of town and in a good area where I will be safe. Let me know if you see anything or know of anything!” Depending on the relationship I have with my current landlord, I would ask if they have anything that suits my needs and let them know I am contemplating moving but am not putting my notice in quite yet. (Some landlords are assholes and will find reasons to evict so this would be an optional step). I would then begin looking on Marketplace, searching rental sites, talking with friends about where they live. Then I would look around my current home. What can I start getting rid of that I don’t want with me in my new place or have no desire to move. I would start packing up little things not used on a daily basis, selling things for extra money that I din’t want or even have a yard sale. I WOULD TAKE ACTION TO GET READY TO MOVE!! This creates a vibratory highway for that new apartment you desire to travel right into your existence!
While waiting for my new apartment to come into my sites, I would be showing my gratitude for the place I currently reside. The fact I am not on the street or living with someone else is something to for sure be thankful for. If I were to be living with someone until my place is available, I would be showing gratitude for the hospitality being shown to me. I would be writing all that gratitude in my journal and truly FEELING thankful. (You can’t fake it till you make it here. Look in your heart and see that there is ALWAYS something to be grateful for! Your alive readin this right now and many didn’t wake up this morning. Be grateful for that!)
And there you have it. The basic of the basics of manifesting and using LOA in a correct and healthy way. Again, I am stressing the importance of your mental & emotional health here. LOA will not create happiness for you, it is not a magical fix to your problems, and you won’t achieve anything if your operating from a place of depression or desperation. You may actually create even more. The Law of Attraction doesn’t care if your a good person or a bad person, it doesn’t judge your character, it rides your vibration, whatever that may be.
With all this being said, I want to be very clear, as I do with clients, I AM NOT MAKING PROMISES!! Too many things go into manifesting and YOU are responsible for your feelings, emotions, intentions, and energy. This is entirely you and YOU have to do the work to ensure your mindset is in the correct place. There are no timetables. Things could take moments, days, weeks, months, even years depending on what your manifesting. If I wanted financial security (Who doesn’t right) I know that takes time and will require work. I will probably be very busy also as the more work you do, the more money you earn. I would use common sense and this would be a long term manifestation that I would consistently be working on. Again, there is SO much that goes into this.
I absolutely love that people are ready for changes and improvements to their life. The buzz around the Law of Attraction is loud and I love helping others and coaching them in the proper way to move forward. What I mostly find is people wanting a quick fix or they are trying to find happiness with things. These people are usually put off when I let them know, neither is attainable with LOA. I don’t fault them for having unrealistic expectations, I fault social media memes, “coaches” claiming their programs will make your dreams come true, and hype people who are always taking about their life changing due to their ability to manifest anything they desire. It leaves it open for those who are down and out, depressed and broken, to think if they spend their last bit of money on these promises that they too will find happiness and have their lives changed in a moment. PLEASE don’t be that person. If you have learned anything form my blogs, you have to put in the healing work and no growth or change has a magical fix. Below I will link blogs where I touched on LOA or grazed the surface of the basics for manifestation, and blogs helping you with tools to have a healthy mindset. I hope this has cleared up some misunderstandings and given you some insight into the Law of Attraction and how it can work for you, if you work for yourself!
Journaling – Because my first suggestion is a gratitude journal and a place to write what your desires are.
Can you Meditate?– The scientific evidence for improving you mental and emotional health is overwhelming and meditation is FREE!
Shifting Outlook– This post has a bunch of LOA information and digs into why it is so damn important to have the right mindset when manifesting
You are choosing misery– This one is placed here because it explains how your outlook and thinking patterns put you exactly in spots that align them. If you believe your life sucks, your life will suck regardless on how hard you try to manifest your way away from it.
For more advice on LOA, manifesting, self empowerment, and real talk advice, follow me on other platforms of social media. Ladies are welcome to join the Koffee Korner FB Group which is a private paid membership space for women. I read cards there in Lives, give instruction on holistic and metaphysical tools to be our best selves, and grow, heal, and evolve into empowered women.
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